words of bundy wisdom

I don't have time to get a life.
I'm too busy living.

You will get bit.

Ask Obama about Jeremiah Wright.

Ask Hillary about Bill.

Ask McCain about himself; but damned his wife is hot.

You know you had better find a new friend when:

He says "Al, do your wife a big favor. Put a studded dog collar around my neck, tie a leash to it, and take me home to her."

Can't get it up: blame global warming.

Can't get it down: blame global warming.

Lost your job: blame global warming.

Weather forecast is wrong: blame global warming.

Now will someone please tell me why I, or anyone else, should believe a bunch of highly educated dip shits who tell me what the temperature is going to be a century from now; when they can't reliably predict what the weather will be tomorrow?

You fool with someone who constantly bitches about being oppressed and you will get burnt. Just ask Wal-Mart.

It will be a truly sad day when we finally see that we have spent most of life trying to keep up with the Jones', only to realize all this shit we have been buying was sold to us by the Jones'.

As I sit here thinking about the shortness of life;
I suddenly realize it wouldn't seem so short,
if my dong was longer.